The Wolverine is infamous for his legendary arrogance. His Royal Grumpiness has an attitude that makes super villains look like pansies. But several times, Wolverine has proven his attitude towards life is what everyone should strive for. The Grumpy-Funny Wolverine has delivered some legendary lines in the comic books.
Well Are You?
Can’t blame him. Kitty Pryde, one of Logan’s most prized proteges, had just sacrificed her life to save thousands of people. She used her phasing abilities to to take a bullet fired by an alien armada. But in the process, she herself ended up phasing out of existence. The only thing Logan craved for was a beer after losing Kitty like that.
When Will You Listen Logan!!
Logan is not the greatest listeners of all. In fact, he is infamous for zoning out right in the middle of conversations. In this comic book issue, Hercules – the Greek god of Strength, is explaining Logan his many exploits. All Logan ever wanted to know was that how did he manage to pull off those stunts wearing nothing but “green speedos.”
Is That Taserface?
You are up against a man who has lived hundreds of years. He has claws that are made up of the strongest metal on earth. His bones are unbreakable. His healing factor virtually makes him invincible. And what did you bring to the fight? A taser? What’s your IQ level you dumbass!!
You see a threat. Logan sees a threat. You see a man on a disabled man on a wheelchair. Logan sees “crazy old man with a wheelchair of death.” We have to say Wolverine did save a lot of lives that day by punching that old geezer.
Is This Grieving?
Wolverine has lost many people over the years. Some to time. Some to enemies old and new. But he does lose a lot of the people that become a huge part of his life. That’s the curse of immortality. And now, he no longer feels guilty. he does not regret. The only emotion he gets when he loses someone is unfathomable rage. Steer clear of him when Logan is ‘grieving’. And may the universe help you if he catches you grieving in the wrong manner!!
He has had his fair share of awkward moments over the years. As an X-Man, Logan has teamed up with many weird heroes like Deadpool. One of the heroes Wolverine once teamed up with was Shanna the She-Devil. She turned out to be a particularly chatty individual. And things took a turn for the worse – for Wolverine. Because he had to do something he finds extremely difficult – entertain a conversation.
Wolverine Didn’t Know That
It’s a bright Monday morning. You are in the Avengers mansion. When suddenly you find two of your friends suddenly coming after you with killing intent. You have no time to lose. You quickly devise a way to trap them while looking for ways to exorcise the demons possessing them. Not Wolverine though. He would just plain stab his friends to save himself the trouble. Nice and easy.
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Everybody Felt That
In a Post Decimation world, most of the mutants have lost their powers due to Scarlet Witch’s reality warping adventure. Molly Hayes of the Runaways is one of the lucky few who still has her mutant powers intact. When she comes across Wolverine, his rugged demeanor intimidates Molly. Logan meant no harm but that never stopped her from using her telekinesis to throw him off a building. And then Wolverine delivers one of his funniest lines ever.
Shut Up Or I’ll Stab You
Wade Wilson really likes to pour salt over wounds. He personally loves to tickle Wolverine’s adamantium laced funny bone. Deadpool realizes someone has been harvesting his organs for years. he hires Wolverine and Captain America, the only two people who know what it feels like to be a science experiment, to help him. Wolverine was then infected by an extra-dimensional virus that took out his healing factor. So he had no way to heal himself from Deadpool’s savage burn.
Logan The Matchmaker
Wolverine is not someone you go to and ask for dating advice. He is not what you would term as a hopeless romantic. He has made a career out of punching dudes in the face and kicking men in the balls. Kitty Pryde clearly has a crush on Colossus. And what’s even sorrier is that of all the people in the world, the only person she could turn to for dating tips is the one person who really likes stabbing people in the face.
Why Wolverine Hates Trees
Before Joss Whedon turned out to be a homophobic, racist and sexist SOB, he was actually admired for his works within the comic book community. Take his contributions to the X-Men comics for example. He helped humanize the mutant superheroes. in this strip, we see Wolverine climbing a tree, trying to hide from beast who Logan thought would eat him.
Moose Or Bear, But Blue
Storylines where characters suffer from amnesia and loss of memories can be very complicated to pull off. But Joss Whedon’s run on the X-Men proved to be a masterpiece in this regard. The Hellfire Club captured wolverine and turned his brain upside down. Wolverine now thinks he is a kid English lord living in the British Countryside. The world’s most ferocious mutant explaining Beast as a “Moore or Bear, but blue” is too hilarious to ignore.
The Astonishing X-Men issue by Joss Whedon is an incredible work of art. And it has so many hilarious Wolverine moments we cannot afford to start counting. Wolverine, like we said, has been reduced to the mentality of a 7 year old. The Hellfire Club is responsible for this debacle. Now Logan plays with clay, climbs tress, and is incredibly fascinated by arts and crafts – especially paper men made out of pink sheets.
You Walked Right Into That One, Cyclops
Cyclops and Wolverine have been rivals. It is a relationship that is stronger than Logan and Jean Grey’s. Logan never misses to poke fun at Cyclops, making fun of his fair or his weird powers. This time, he made fun of his weird red glasses. We believe Logan spent all night trying to come up with that. And that look on his face means that it was all worth it!!
That’s Gotta Hurt
Never try to outwit Logan in wordplay. He wouldn’t think twice before making it personal. The other guy never saw it coming. And he will probably steer clear since those third degree burns would be pretty damn painful already.